My Diary

8:23pm: winding down
this year is slowly screeching to a halt.. in some ways im glad but in other ways im really upset.. i mean obviously travis and i are gonna struggle to stay together when hes in college, but im so glad to get away from some of the stupid people in the senior class... i can tell next year is gonna be 75% less stressful just because i dont have to deal with stupid people. i dono, this year has just flown by.. soon it will be me graduating.. its so weird.. how short life really is.. it seems like just awhile ago i was in mr. morses class wearing my backwards visor and my baggy pants pretending to be a boy.. i dont even know.. i just wish i could be in a good mood, its so weird latley, idk if im happy or sad or what.. im just really here. its weird to think about you know? right now i could die.. how many peoples lives would change? how many people would even care? what would school be like without me..? the same or different? i gotta go

i love travis

9:36am: vacation...
im leaving for virginia today at 8 pm.. i dont wanna go. im gonna miss travis so much. i always get really depressed when i have to leave him. i just want vacation to go by as quickly as possible.. as strange as that sounds... later


Goodbye sweet love.. goodbye.

7:57pm: My Travis
so, me and travis are "going out" now lol.. on march 31.. yuppp

hmm, hes leaving for baltimore though.. sad sad.. hes coming back monday and im leaving that thursday for virginia!! haha! so we basically will see eachother for 3 days over a 2 week period.. yess. im finally going to find out if absence makes the heart grow fonder lol.

umm, im on the big VARSITY TENNIS team.. yess. lol thats basically my life in about 5 sentences lol.. i dont have time to write anymore, im too busy being lazy. lattteerr.

I.:.LOVE.:.HAROLD.:.DWAYNE.:.TRAVIS.:.DUNTON

10:07am: Last night
hung out with travis d travis b and tori fletcher (aka twinzee!) haha well we went to look for prom dresses and i found one.. but idk if i want it b/c a lotta other girls will probably have one. and i dont wanna match people at the prom. that would be embarassing! so im gonna look for one in verginia.. and if i dont find one then i will go back and look again.
idk i dont even know what color dress i would look good in. the only fun part of prom is getting readdyyyy.
today hanging out with chelsea wagner and tony... maybe travis b and tori.. maybe nyasha and sierria.. and obviously my travis. uggg.. OH! i got a new cell phone after like 3023 days of not having a nice one. its the same one as collins.. hmm. oh well... later

9:19pm: Waiting for the right moment...
so, rode to school w/ travis today.. and we talked about stuff.. and he told me that we are "going out" but hes just waiting for the right moment to make it "official" yesss.. so i got a tanning package from trav and his parents for my bday.. but im not gonna go all outta control and turn black.. im just gonna get a nice base tan so this summer i actually tan well. and i got a 100 dollar pass to go to bangor tennis. today mr archer asked me if i was playing tennis (b/c im doing pretty well in pickle ball) and i was like yes! lol im pretty excited for that b/c i fucking hate softball. i actually feel bad for all of the girls that are playing.. b/c its sooooo stupid.. lol whatever though.

ilovetravis

6:27pm: yessss
okay, so 16 whole years and i still dont know what to do with myself lol.. umm lets see.. fighting with travis.. i hope it works out b/c i hate fighting with him.. its b/c i have a sore back.. it makes me a little bitchy.. and i just fucking hate school.. jesus its aweful.. i cant stand being expected to do all the fucking work! its so hard.. i hate it. and teachers just think its funny.. like i get good grades and everything but it is hard! everything is just so fucked up right now i dont even understand. whatever. i just wish me and travis would stop fighting, that would make me happy.

you.ARE.all.I.need

9:18pm: Seth Dwyer is the man
okay so idk the name of the song but it goes "every time we touch i get this feeling, and every time we kiss i swear i can fly.." well seth dwyer lip synced it in front of the school.. it was so funny.. idk i cant explain it but it was hilarious.

umm hung out with travis today.. ;-) yess.... umm that is it.. haha

MEGAN&TRAVIS

7:21pm: Divercified Ink
so, had school.. nothing really happened..
after school i went with travis to get his TATTOO!!!!! we went to divercified ink, because my mom recomended it to travis b/c she knows the guy who runs it. his name is Ed, and he is a HELLSANGEL! ahh! scary. him and my mommy are good friends. so anyhow, travis got his tattoo all done up and it looks great. and at the parlor i had to be secretary b/c the real one left b/c it was almost time to go.. it was fun. he liked me and travis a lot. yup. that is it!

meganlovestravis

9:07pm: I don't know what to say?
so i guess travis and i are basically the most confusing 2 people in the world. today i went with him so he could check out some tattoo shops, and he introduced me to everyone as his "girlfriend" but tonight, after we had gone to watch a movie with brian (fucking great) he was calling all these people to see if they wanted to play poker (but they didnt because poker is fucking stupid) and no one wanted to play. so then travis was gonna go play anyways! that means he'd make a lousy 20 bucks if he won. and i was like well are you taking me home if no one wants to play. and he scoffed and was like well yeah. so obviously i was pissed just because of the way he said it so i just looked out the window.. but.. WTF?!?! you dont wanna fucking hang out with me??!! are you all of the sudden too good for me so that you cant hang out with me for like 1 more hour before you go to play??!! jesus. so he just dropped me off and when he walked me to the door hes like omg you are so inconsiderate! fuck you im inconsiderate!! i went to the mall and spend all of my money which was like a total of $30 to buy him a gift and look nice for his birthday party, i got my hair all wavy.. and i looked really nice.. i wouldnt have done that if i wasnt going to his fucking house.. i just would have asked my hairstylist to tell me how to do it!!!!! and hes like well i dont think we should be together anymore b/c you get so pissed off, hes like there is no point if we are just going to fight.. and im like well jesus travis you pissed me off i have emotions.. so just give me a second to chill out before you are like whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong whats wrong??!! and then he just snapped out of it.. we stood there for like 3 minutes after i said that and hes like.. okay im sorry maybe tomorrow we can go to breakfast together.. and i was like okay.. and he hugged me and kissed me good night.. but i know once he got in the car with brian he called me a bitch.. i just know it

6:43pm: ADVENTURE DAY!
so today i tried some new things:
*I had thaifood..
**Eggroles (I've never ever eaten one before and it was DELICIOUS!!)
**Vegetable fried rice
**Beef Saja(or something like that, it turned out to be tariaki beef)
**2 sauces (one was a peanut sauce, and a sweet tangy sauce, I dipped my eggroles and rice in them)
**Fried icecream (yum yum!!)
*I went to a museum..
There were lots of nice paintings, but i was really shocked at how boring i thought it was.. it was all black and white photography.. and it got really sickening to look at, but then i went to another room where there were etchings, they were really cool. they were unclear so you really had to think about what it was (unless you wanted to cheat and look at the title) i got them right though, one was the eiffel tower and one was a table setting.. they were really pretty.. also there were picutures of forests and deserts.. they were really realistic!!!!!!

but i also did some things that weren't really new to me.. i hung out with travis today.. its really fun spending time with him.. we get along really well now.. its really exciting!

ILOVEHAROLDDWAYNETRAVISDUNTON

9:16pm: AMANDA MAE!
hung out with my amanda mae last night.. we watched some movies.. played with my kitty; LOU! hmm.. went to the mall today and i got a new shirt so i can wear it to travis' party. lol its not like i have to look all nice, i just wanted to lol.. umm idk that is pretty much it.. i dont think im gonna get to see travis tomorrow either :-( gosh!! oh well i know i will get to see him saturday and sunday..

Megan+Travis

11:31am: last night
last night i went to travis' house with brian mcgowan :-\ and melissa A. we watched waiting.. its pretty funny.. then we started to watch saw II but then melissa felt sick so brian took her home.. and then me and travis were alone and we just watched tv.. well actually i was reading a magazine and he was watching tv.. but close enough.. then he started to listen to his ipod.. and he got all cuddled up to me.. and then he gave me one headphone.. and we started listening to our song.. i started to cry.. (tim mcgraw its your love, if you were wondering) and then he was like megan im sorry and we kissed.. and then we listened to amazed..by lonestar.. and that is like our second song. and i started crying again.. and we kissed again.. and then he decided he didnt like me crying so we listened to some song about a bicycle.. lol. Then we just cuddled, i miss him so much.. but idk i would feel so much better if we were really together..
:-(

10:02am: YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!
so last night hung out w. travis..
AMAZING! god..
we went to the movies..
we didnt fight once..
we flirted the whole night..
it was so great..
and then we went back to my house to play board games w. my parents..
but before we went inside i got a little upset.. idk why haha
im on the rag okay? haha anyways..
i started to get upset and travis was like "how come you are so upset"
and i just shrugged my shoulders
and hes like "well you have no reason to be upset.. we will be going out soon... is that why you are upset"
and i said yes..
and then he was like
"megan we are pretty much going out anyways.. its just that stupid saying 'we are going out'.. we are together and you know it..!!"
omg im so excited you dont even know!! yes yes yes yes yes!! :-) :-)
(and by the way.. we won.. we played cranium w. my parents.. we kick ass at that game!)

**<3<3<3TRAVIS<3<3<3**

10:54pm: schools out
feb break.. yesss
well.. i really dono i just hate school, more than anything.. this summer is gonna be the best.. i will have freedom.. and a JOB! and service learning (yuck) oh well

so basically me and travis are going slow now? and aparantly neither of us know what that means.. hmm.

life sucks, and that is it

IVE.GOT.nothing.LFET.FOR.you.TO.TAKE.away

3:29pm: :-)
hockey game tonight...
im going..
because well, im awesome!

so today, nothing really happened.. except i am the single most awesome goalie in floor hockey.. i only let in 1 goal in the game AND in a shoot out! causing our team to win!!! yes.. im so great haha

so like i said hockey game tonight.. thats pretty much it..


I.REALLY.DONT.WANT.TO.BE.YOUR.DIRTY.LITTLE.SECRET

3:35pm: Valentines day
okay, so today is the day where people who like eachother hook up and get gifts for eachother, and today is the day where couples mack allover eachother all day..it makes me sick.. and neither of those things happened to me.. whatever ive always said i hate valentines day.. now i really hate it

megan.loves.travis

8:28pm: tourneys today, we won! idk by how much and i dont really care.. brigida scored her first points of the season this game, 4 whole points! she scored more than me! lol she had an awesome game!!

not much happened.. ive been gone all day.. i gave brigit her present! she loves it... pretty much it

oh yeah friday ANOTHER bomb threat.. this time in the girls room.. ugh.. people are so stupid.. this time we evacuated the school durring 3rd block.. its obvious that no one would follow through with it.. and if we keep getting out of school for it they are just going to keep doing it.. b/c they wont be able to figure out who it is..

letmecatchMYSELFbeforeifall

6:43pm: AHHH
alright so long story short
*travis hung out w. emily sypher behind my back and lied about likeing her
*i started hanging out with mo garcia b/c i needed to talk to SOMEONE about travis
*then mo started always telling me i was pretty and really paid attention to me and made me feel good about myself.. unlike travis recently
*travis saw me the hockey game looking at him like i loved him and got mad
*somehow i convinced travis to not be mad at me about it...? dont ask me how but i guess we are okay now.

and in some later news:

BOMB THREAT BOMB THREAT!!

durring 4th block today someone one wrote - in blood! - "im going to bomb the school" and so i didnt have practice.. YAY!! lol so basically im scared about it cause this kinda thing happens in movies, but then again if i get hurt my lover will come and save me (aka travis) just like in the movies yay!

LAST REGULAR SEASON HOME GAME IS TOMORROW! you hoes better show up 5:30 JV 7:00 Varsity.. come cheer us on!

you.mean.the.WORLD.to.me

2:58pm: today was good.. travis and i fought.. duh.. what the fuck else is new.. hung out with MO rachilll, travis f, dylan and taylor after school.. yeah.. maybe going to the hockey game with mo tonight.. idk..

So travis told me that he only tells me the truth.. so he actually admits that all the shit he tells is friends is.. well.. shit

and hes buying me an "expenisve" gift for V. day, what idk is how is he going to get them to believe that its just an "as a friend" gift if its expensive?? when it really isnt going to be an as a friend gift?? i dono whatever.. everything is rediculous.. and now some of his friend are starting to see what a dick hole he is.. no names will be mentioned

*stitch* your lips closed.. and keep the secrets in

9:31pm: :-D
Things i did: played basketball, talked to brigida, not much

Goals: get over travis.. fast

forever is just a word

7:00pm: :-D
i fucking hate brian mcgowan.. its actually reciculous.. i dont even fucking talk to the kid.. but he has this need to fucking need to say all these dirogatory comments to me.. he fucking starts shit with me and i dont even fucking look at the kid.. but obviously when he says shit to me then im going to say stuff back.. hes such an ass. hes like "yeah so many people hate you in this school" okay like nyasha.. brian.. and maybe 4 other boys on the b-ball team.. but i dont really fucking care if they hate me because they have no reason to.. so whatever brian has no right to say that to me because about 85% of the student body fucking hates him.. so w/e hes a loser.. and i dont want to be involved with his bullshit anymore.. next time he says anything to me im just going to ignore him.. whatever.. ill act like the "bigger" person cause he obviously cant.. lol

anyways.. hung out with mo, brigida, ben and bruce today.. pretty fun, pretty fun.. yup.. idk whatever.. im to pissed to talk right now

Never Talk S.I.D.E.W.A.Y.S

11:08am: mm-hmm
alright, so me and travis are hanging out today? possibly i guess.. yay superbowl. even if we do hang out then its not like we will talk.. cause its superbowl day.. yeahh.

I dont even know


I fancied you'd return the way you said.. -Sylvia Plath

6:46pm: :-(
okay so basically travis has been sneaking around behind my back with emily sypher.. and who knows who else.. and he still thinks he has reasons to be mean/mad..



I FUCKING HATE LIFE

i f e l l f o r t h e w r o n g b o y

6:00pm: last night..
last night was the greatest night ive had in a while. trav and i talked.. i was upset cause today is.. well it WOULD be our 15th month but well.. haha its not :-( and i told him i was upset about it and he said "well you know that at this time next month we WILL be going back out anyways" :-D yessss


a b s o l u t l y i n l o v e

10:34pm: :-) :-)
today i hung out with travis.. we went to the show at the glenburn community center thingy.. we did some things before that though.. and we kissed in public!!!!!!! and i think we are getting so much better.. and im just so excited that i cant even explain it.. god i need him so bad!